Chapter 52
‘I Hadley Jordan Carrington, reject you Jamie-Lee . . ‘ the warrior starts as my heart breaks in two.
‘Please don’t, I’m begging you, please don’t do this’ I whisper again, trying to stop the words from falling from his lips.
‘Jamie-Lee Sparks’ Hadley chokes out, his grip on my hand painful, my own nails digging into his skin as I try to keep him a part of me.
‘Caden’ I turn to the Alpha desperately, tears rolling down my face, ‘make him stop, please, order him to stop!’
The young Alpha is blinking hard as he slowly shakes his head, ‘he made his mind up baby’ he replies softly, ‘we didn’t want you to have the guilt of the rejection on your shoulders.’
I shake my head, ‘no, the guilt is still there’ I argue, ‘it’s still because of me!’ I turn back to Hadley, ‘you are doing this because of me, it’s still my fault.’
The warrior’s voice cracks and the words die on his lips as he stares at me, ‘one of us has to do this’ he croaks, ‘you need to be Luna sweetheart, you need to.’
I finally wrench my hands from both of them and cover my face, sobbing uncontrollably. A hand rests on my back as Caden’s pain filled voice reaches me, ‘do you want Hadley?’ he asks roughly.
I nod, unable to look at the Alpha, I want my mate, I want him!
Caden makes a strangled noise before he clears his throat, ‘OK baby’ he mumbles, as his hand retracts, ‘I Caden Scott Star reject . . ‘
‘Wait! What are you doing?’ I shriek, snatching my hands away from my face as Hadley roars out, trying to reach over me to slam his hand over the Alpha’s mouth.
‘No, we agreed that it would be me Star, you know I’m right’ Hadley yells furiously.
‘She wants you Carrington’ Caden snaps back, ‘you just heard her, she wants you! I won’t force her to pick me, and neither will you.’
I scramble up from between them, moving around the coffee table so it’s between us as my hands go to my h**s.
‘Will you both stop!’ I growl with everything I have, the sound making both men turn to me in shock. ‘Did either of you think to ask me what I want?’ I demand. ‘You can’t do this! I understand your thought process and I know why you did it. I appreciate it, that you would try to protect me in this way, take the burden from my shoulders so that I can live without the guilt, but . . ‘ I take a deep breath, my knees wobbling as I sink to the floor, ‘you can’t make this decision for me’ I whisper, ‘it’s mine and mine alone.’
‘But you just said . .’ Caden starts and I hold my hand up in between us to stop him from continuing.
‘You asked me if I wanted Hadley, and I said I did’. I shake my head slightly, correcting myself ‘I do’. Raising an eyebrow at the Alpha as he goes to speak again, I add, ‘and I also want you. I want you both, and I can’t make this decision because it is killing me, but I need to because if I don’t . . . ‘ I gulp, tears threatening again, ‘If I don’t, I lose you both’ I whisper.
‘What?’ Caden shouts, standing up and walking to me, sinking down beside me so he can cup my face in his hands, holding my gaze.
‘My dad told me’ I explain, ‘if I don’t let one of you mate and mark me before the full moon rises, our bonds will be severed by the Moon Goddess, I . . I lose both of you.’
‘That settles it’ Hadley snarls, ‘Caden you need to mark her, that can’t happen, this pack needs her.’
‘I’m not forcefully marking her dude’ the Alpha growls back, ‘she needs to be willing, bare her neck to me.’
Hadley joins us on the floor, curling his arm around me, ‘sweetheart’ he murmurs desperately, ‘please, you need to let him mark you, we can’t all end up alone.’
I hate this, hate it so much, why did the Goddess do this to me? To these two amazing men who didn’t do anything to deserve this horrible situation. I want to go outside and scream at the moon, yell until my voice gives up and tell her just how much I hate her and her stupid games.
‘I don’t know what to do’ I whimper, ‘it’s not fair! Why did she do this? Why is she hurting us all?’
The two men hold me between them, trying to comfort me with our bonds, ‘I don’t know baby’ Caden sighs, ‘I wish I did, I just know she has a reason.’
I scoff bitterly, ‘yeah, her reason is to rip me in two for not wanting a mate bond’ I grumble. ‘Oh you think you are more important than any other wolf, that you should be able to fall in love like a human? I’ll show you, here’s two mates! And just to make it really bad, you’ll fall in love with both of them.’
I feel both men still as my eyes widened at what I just said and I slam my hand over my mouth, like that’s going to bring them back into my mouth some how.
‘You . . . you love us?’ Hadley asks quietly.
I shut my eyes as I nod quickly, I can’t look at them, I just can’t, but I also can’t deny it, I love them both, they complete me.
‘Leeway’ Caden breathes raggedly into my hair.From NôvelDrama.Org.
‘I’m sorry, you said not to say it before I decided, I’m so sorry’ I whisper, ‘it slipped out.’
Caden laughs hollowly, ‘it’s OK baby, I kind of needed to hear it.’ He sighs, ‘but it doesn’t solve our problem.’
My shoulders sag, ‘why does it have to be this way? Why are you an Alpha?’ I mutter dejectedly.
‘What?’ Caden huffs in confusion, ‘why does me being an Alpha matter?’
I meet his gaze sadly, ‘my parents said if you had also been a warrior, maybe we could have talked to the council, got them to let me keep both of you. With you being an Alpha, you’ll be possessive of me, wont be able to share, they said . . ‘ I sniff back my tears, ‘they said you might kill Hadley if I was pregnant with your pup and he tried to get near me.’
I curl in on myself, rocking slightly, ‘Even if you could get past it, I couldn’t have pups with Hadley’ I add, ‘he’d sit on the side lines of our family, and I couldn’t do that too him.’
Both of my mates are frowning at my words, ‘I wouldn’t kill Hadley’ Caden finally stated in confusion, ‘he’s no threat to you. To be honest, he’s probably the only male I would allow near you if you were carrying our pup as Cobalt and I know that he’s the only other person in the pack who values your safety as much as we do.’
‘But what if you change your mind?’ I mutter worriedly, ‘my parents said . . ‘
‘Your parents know nothing about this’ the Alpha cuts me off, ‘if you don’t believe me, talk to Cobalt.’ His eyes changed to gold and the gravelly voice of Caden’s wolf rumbles out.
‘Human is right, Hunter would not hurt our pup, he would die to protect it, I have no reason to kill him when he is so devoted to you’ the wolf says firmly.
I turn to Hadley who is watching me, ‘but you still wouldn’t get your family’ I mumble, ‘I have to have the Alpha’s pups, you’d always be without the family you crave.’
The warrior shakes his head, ‘no I wouldn’t’ he replies with a small smile, ‘you would be my family. Plus, the pups that you and Caden made? I would love them as my own, as Cobalt said, I would die to protect you and your pups without a second thought.’
His eyes darkened as Hunter pushes forward, smiling happily, ‘any pups that mate produces would be our pups’ he growls. ‘They may not grow from my seed, but they would still be my b***d.’
My body is trembling as I look at each of my mates, Caden’s eyes return to normal, as he slowly reaches out and touches my cheek. ‘Baby’ he says softly, ‘what do you want?’
I let out a shuddering breath as I bite my bottom l*p, ‘it doesn’t matter’ I mumble, ‘I can’t have it anyway, the council . . ‘
‘Leeway’ the Alpha rumbles, ‘forget everything else, forget the council and your parents, forget my father and his damn rules, what do YOU want?’
I look at each of them, my head in a mess as I try to vocalise what I want, ‘I want both of you’ I mutter in defeat, ‘I can’t help it, I want both of you, you are my mates. Skarla loves Hunter and Cobalt, she doesn’t want either of you to break your bond with her, just hearing you try caused her so much pain.’
Cobalt flashes across Caden’s eyes, hurt flickering there from hearing his mate was suffering, glancing back at Hadley, I find that Hunter is still on the surface, also whimpering for his mate.
The Alpha stands up, holding out his hand to me as I furrow my brow in confusion. ‘Come with me Leeway’ he murmurs, closing his hand around mine as I place my palm to his. ‘And you’ he adds to Hadley who is back in control again, the warrior also standing and taking my other hand, the pair of them pulling me to my feet.
‘Where are we going?’ I ask uncertainly.
The Alpha smiles, ‘we’re going to claim our mate’ he replies simply.
‘But, I haven’t decided’ I stammer in confusion, ‘I need to decide first.’
The Alpha shakes his head, ‘you already did baby, you chose us both, so you are going to get us both.’
‘But the council . . ‘ I continue to protest as both men tug me gently toward the stairs.
‘Won’t get here in time to stop us’ Caden finishes firmly, ‘by the time anyone knows what is happening, our marks will already be on your neck and yours will be on ours. Once the marks are in place, no one can break them, the Council will just have to deal with it.’
‘But what about Hadley, pups?’ I try again, my feet following the two werewolves automatically, I just can’t not do as they want me to.
‘Jamie-Lee’ Caden says tiredly, stopping so he can face me, ‘your first pup needs to be mine, and really so does your second to continue the Alpha line. After that, who is to say your third pup couldn’t be Hadley’s? Or your fourth? Or your fifth?’
I splutter at his words, ‘how many times are you thinking of getting me pregnant?’ I mumble, making them both chuckle.
‘As many times as you’ll let us sweetheart’ Hadley replies with a wink.
‘Baby, Hunter has already said, any pup you produce, he will see as his pup no matter who the father is. Cobalt feels exactly the same, any pup that comes out of your body is our pup and we will treat him or her as such.’
I look back at Hadley uncertainly, ‘are you OK with that?’ I ask, ‘with Caden getting me pregnant the first two times? You’ll have to, you know, wear . . .’ I nod toward his crotch with my head, making him chuckle.
‘I am more than happy to wait my turn sweetheart’ the warrior replies, ‘I will wear condoms for the rest of my life if that is what you want, I just want you.’
I look down for a moment, nibbling on my l*p, absorbing their words before raising my head and nodding.
‘OK’ I agree, relief washing over me, ‘but can we hurry up because I really don’t want to give anyone time to stop us.’
‘Your wish is my command’ Caden growls, hoisting me up on his shoulder and running up the stairs, Hadley behind us laughing as I shriek.
‘Bedroom to the right Star’ the warrior calls out as we reach the top and I’m swung around as Caden kicks in Hadley’s bedroom door, carrying me inside.