The Glimpse of My Past

Diane’s P. O. V.

I didn’t know what kind of negative vibration had suddenly mauled over me. It paralyzed my whole body while looking at my boyfriend being kissed by someone else. I wanted to think reasonably, but my mind got suddenly clouded with different judgments I couldn’t help but contemplate at the moment.

Even if I wanted to avert my eyes, I couldn’t do it. Even if I wanted to grab the hair and tweak this woman out of the elevator, I could not move even my fingers.

It was as if I got stuck in my position, secretly hurting while looking at a nasty scene in front of me. I was hurt beyond what hurt means, and the pain already exploded within me. My legs felt shaky no matter how I was controlling them not to be. I was trying so hard to stand tall with my head held up high, but my head was feeling heavy, making me betray myself in the process.

As if on cue, something like a sharp dagger abruptly pierced my chest at what my eyes were seeing. Was it just shock, or was it already jealousy?

It was maybe because of an extreme surprise why Liam couldn’t immediately react to what this woman did. When he finally got his senses back, he slightly pushed the brunette away from him, but it doesn’t change the fact that the two of them shared a five-second kiss… or even longer. Then, I looked away. 

Leandro seemed to be enjoying what was happening around me when I glanced at him. An evil smirk was evident on his lips. After all, he might have planned this to avenge me. He came back… and just like what he did to Trixie this morning, he was also using this woman.

“Hey! I miss you, babe. But, what’s with that look?” she even caressed Liam’s face before she continued. “Sorry if I surprised you, but I’m here now. I was able to fulfill my promise to be with you. Would you believe that I even dealt with long and interconnected flights just to follow you here? Anyway, don’t you miss me?” she asked Liam while intentionally bumping me, making me step aside.

Not long ago, I was just right next to Liam, now this woman who looked like a rice-cake-only-made-with-flour was between the two of us. As if the pain was not enough, my eyes even stretched a little wider at what she did next.

And she really had the nerve to clasp her left hand on my boyfriend’s sturdy right arm, huh? She’s annoying, but I should calm myself here. Diane, just relax and take a deep breath!

Behind my façade was a jealous girlfriend who could do nothing but covertly sulk herself in anger. Our real relationship was only a secret, and we should be in a complete boss-employee stunt here. No one should know that I was the CEO’s real girlfriend.

But why would this damn whore call my Liam her babe? I silently smirked at them because I couldn’t believe that I even cussed in my head.

“Isabelle, what are you doing here?” Liam asked that bitch, but he seemed to be worried while glancing at me. Maybe he was only checking out on me at how I reacted after what happened.

Isabelle? Who is she? Liam never mentioned a certain Isabelle to me! I narrowed my eyes.

“What kind of question is that, Liam? I’m here because I wanted to see you. I have always been missing you, babe! Don’t you remember our last conversation before we parted in the States? But by the way, who is she?” Isabelle asked Liam, and she was referring to me. She arched her perfectly-trimmed eyebrow while peevishly eyeing me from head to toe.

“She’s Diane, she’s my girl-” Liam replied, and he was about to introduce me as his girlfriend when I immediately interrupted him before he could reveal everything.

“I’m one of the Payroll Supervisors here, ma’am.” It was a good thing that I didn’t stutter, and my voice remained intact.

God knew how much I wanted to cry at the moment, but I was only holding back my tears from welling up my eyes. Like my head, my chest felt too heavy now and that would even prompt me to give up at this time.

I have to get out of here before my first tear roll down my cheek.

“Oh, I see. Nice meeting you, Diane. I’m Isabelle, Liam’s girlfriend.” She reached out her hand to shake hands with me, but she was giving me a sarcastic grin. She was overbearing, and her stares would make me want to disappear.

My eyes got wider than usual at what this woman had said. I could even feel that my eyeballs could come out of my sockets anytime soon because she just dropped a grenade in front of me. Aggrieved, I horridly glanced at Liam, and based on his stares, he was silently telling me not to believe this bitch. But it was all too late. Too much pain had already enveloped my brain.

Just seeing her pompously kiss the person I loved was already painful to me, how much more when my two ears would clearly hear that she is Liam’s girlfriend? Damn it!

So, what is my role to Liam? A Philippine-based girlfriend? Did he make me his girlfriend so he could easily get inside my pants? Fuck him!

As long as I could still bear it, I still wore my invisible mask. Then, I smilingly accepted Isabelle’s hand for a firm handshake. After that, I decided to bid farewell to them. I knew that my tears would soon fall in my eyes if I would only stay here.

“Nice meeting you too, Miss Isabelle. I’ll go ahead, Sir Leandro,” I said before I looked at Liam, “and Sir L-Liam.” My voice slightly cracked as I pronounced his name. I didn’t waste any second-I just turned my back on them before leaving the elevator. At the same time, I couldn’t suppress my tears anymore.

“Diane, wait-” I felt Liam hold my left arm to stop me and explain himself, but I quickly pulled my arm away from him and immediately went back to our office.

I even heard how that floured rice cake asked Liam, “Babe, what’s the matter?” but I didn’t bother to hear his answer.

When I sauntered inside the Finance Department, I immediately went straight to the office restroom just across my desk and locked myself in there. That was the time my tears continued to roll down my cheeks. With my shaky and clammy hands, I held my chest.Upstodatee from Novel(D)ra/m/a.O(r)g

Sometimes, pain crushed us-leaving us incapable of everything. It would leave us broken-in and out. Tears would not roll down at first, but when they did, it was when we would realize that we were not strong the way how we seemed to be, or how we preferred us to be, and the screams wouldn’t escape past our quivering lips.

Why me? Did I deserve this horrible pain? Was it so easy for Liam that he left a girlfriend in the States, then he would also have a girlfriend here? Damn him!

So, will you only let yourself cry here? You knew that he would introduce you earlier as his girlfriend, but you interrupted him. You’re the one who wanted that no one here in the company should know about your real relationship, correct? Boss and employee status, huh? Now, bear all that pains just to cover your useless pretense!

Darn this little voice inside my head! I looked upwards-at the exhaust and even at the ceiling-as if it would help me ease my feelings and hold back my tears from falling.

Is this the payment for that one great delight you’ve made me feel earlier? Why, Liam? Why did you do this to me? I was looking at my reflection from the mirror.

Why do you have to make me feel like a queen whenever I’m with you when someone else came first, who already owns your heart? You pulled me with one hand but pushed away with the other, and it was making me miserable right now! 

Why did I fall for you in just a short time after we’ve met? Why did I give my ‘yes’ to you in just two days? Why am I so stupid to always listen to my feelings to the point that I forgot to use my brain? Why did I immediately trust your words and promises?

Still holding my chest, I could not properly breathe anymore. It felt like my throat began to constrict, and my heart was beating so fast. It was as if, at any rate, I would be experiencing a heart attack, although I didn’t have any heart disease. I was still sobbing inside the restroom when someone suddenly knocked on the door.