The Accidental Wife (Emily and Julian)

5

I'm either a good liar or my friends have given up on me. I don't mind either of these things. I know I have caused everyone around me enough trouble and I don't expect them to help me anymore. They deserve to live their life the way they want without needing to worry about me.

It's been a few days since Silas showed up at my place. I lied to him when I said I didn't hear my phone because I was napping. He called me before I went to take a nap. I didn't want to pick up.

I made the decision to get out of his life and although it is hard to do so, I know that it's the right thing to do. He has a girlfriend now and I'm trying to accept that he can no longer be mine. But just because I'm trying to come to terms with my new reality, that doesn't mean that I'm strong enough to maintain a friendship with him.

I truly value all his efforts to make sure that I'm okay, but it doesn't take a genius to figure out that my presence in his life isn't healthy at all. He needs to have a normal life away from me.

My heart broke when I learned that he started dating Maisie, but I knew that was bound to happen sooner or later. She is a beautiful girl who seems to be fun, and they have been spending a lot of time together, so what would hold him from dating her?

It's Friday already. I lied to my parents and told them I had important projects I needed to work on, so I wouldn't be able to go to their place this weekend. I can go, but I don't want to. I want to spend some time alone.

In fact, I'm going out tonight all alone. I plan on having a drink or two. I don't want to get shitfaced, but I just want to drink a little. They say alcohol numbs the pain a little and I need to numb my pain.

I never thought that getting my memory back would be that painful. The doctors didn't prepare me for this moment. Lately, I have been remembering a lot of things; however, sometimes, I can't help but wonder whether I'm truly remembering things or tricking my mind into making false memories based on what I have been told by Silas, my friends and my family.

I know I could ask them, but I don't want to. I want to be alone for a while. Maybe if I spend more time alone I will be able to figure things out in a better way.

I put on something nice and apply make up before heading out of my apartment. I wish I could move out of this apartment to be away from Silas, but my parents won't like this idea.

Since I plan on drinking, I opt for taking an Uber instead of driving. I don't plan on putting myself or any other person in danger. To be honest, I'm nervous. I have never drunk before, but what's the worst that's going to happen? It's not like I plan on getting completely drunk, but that doesn't take away the anxiousness I'm feeling.Content protected by Nôv/el(D)rama.Org.

I pay my Uber once I reach the bar and I sharply inhale. For a moment, I think about going back home, but even if this is a bad decision, what's the worst that's going to happen?

I walk inside the pub and head straight to the bar. This place is nicer than the one Everest took me to. For a moment, I don't know what to order, but then I decide on something fruity.

The bartender asks for my ID and I feign being confident as I show him the fake ID I bought. Luckily, the bartender bought my lie. It's probably because of the make up I have on. I have applied a slightly heavier amount to make myself look older.

I finish my first drink before I know it. I thought the taste would be heavier, but I guess it is fruitier than I thought.

"What's a beauty like you doing on her own?" A man says as he brings himself beside me. I'm not interested in talking to anyone. I just want to be on my own.

"I want to be on my own," I reply without looking at him.

"Maybe we can be alone together." I roll my eyes and ignore him I'm not in the mood to talk to anyone. "Come on. Let's have some fun," he stresses. I feel him place his hand on the small of my back, but I quickly slap it away.

"Leave me alone!" I snap at him.

"Man, if you don't leave her alone, I'm going to get the bouncer to throw you out," the bartender chimes in and I breathe out in relief.

The man shoots me one dirty look before walking away. At least he walked away.

"Thank you." I smile at the bartender.

"You don't look like you belong here," he comments, but I say nothing. I don't even know where I belong anymore. It feels like I don't belong anywhere. I sometimes wonder if I'm a parasite that's trying to latch on to whatever surface it can find. "Can you make me a stronger drink?" I request and he nods. I'm glad that it's not talkative. I don't want to talk to anyone.

My original plan was to have two drinks, but I end up having four. Realizing that even alcohol isn't strong enough to numb my pain, I decide that it's time for me to leave. The thing is, I know I'm too drunk to leave on my own and I'm scared of ordering Uber. I reach for my phone and after five minutes of thinking, I decide to call Knox. I'm not going to ask Sabrina to come and get me and surely, calling Silas isn't an option.

"Hello Knox," I slur. This is my first time to hear myself sounding like that.

"Rosie, are you all right?" He sounds worried. I hate myself for worrying everyone around me.

"I'm drunk. Do you think you can pick me up?" I embarrassingly ask.

"Of course! Send me your location and I will pick you up." After hanging up, I send him my location.

Being the queen of stupid decisions, I order another drink and sip it until Knox arrives. I don't know what I'm doing to myself, but all I know is that I want to silence the war that has been going on in my mind.

My therapist isn't helping anymore and I wonder if it's because I don't have the urge to get better or she's just not good. "What have you done to yourself, Rosie?" I look up when I hear a familiar voice that does not belong to Knox.

My eyes widen for a second when I see Silas in front of me and I wonder if alcohol is playing tricks on me. I blink, thinking that he will disappear when I do so, but he doesn't. He is still there, standing in front of me.

"I called Knox, didn't I?" I ask him. I called Knox, didn't I? Did I call Silas by mistake, thinking he was Knox?

"You did, but you got me instead," he says, looking at the empty glass in front of me.

"Lucky me," I mutter, looking away from him.

"She's only nineteen. How could you serve her alcohol?" Silas snaps at the bartender.

"Leave him alone. I have a pretty convincing fake ID. Plus, he has been nice, keeping his eyes on me," I defend the poor man whose name I don't know.

"Let's go." Silas sighs heavily.

I attempt to stand up on my own, but I think the alcohol in me is strong enough to make me unable to stand. Before I fall, Silas catches me with one arm and I find myself holding onto him.

"Let's get you home, Rosie," he whispers, still holding onto me.

Even in my darkest moments, he is there to pick up my broken pieces.