49
Isabella I’m not sure how many more hellish days I can have.
I just don’t know how much more I can take.
I want to say today was the day from hell, but every time I think that I remember my handsome stranger from the park. I remember his words.
It can’t be that bad.
That’s what he said, and he thought death was worse. The pain you experience when someone dies.
Having gone through that pain twice, I know what he was saying is truth. Nothing compares to the feeling of loss when you’ve lost someone you love.
Worst, when you watch them die.
I watched my mother die and then I watched Eric die. Both deaths were a result of my father. Both cemented the hatred I have for him.
Hatred that first took root when I watched my father kill my mother.
As far as I know I’m the only one who knows the truth about the way she died. I’m the only one who knows it was him who killed her. He told everyone else it was the Syndicate who killed his wife. That was how he’d gained support from many of the powerful people who ally themselves with him. He lied.
He threatened to kill me if I ever spoke the truth and I was so scared and shocked by what he’d done I didn’t speak for a year.
By then he’d sent me here to live with Nicolai.
I was ten when Mama died, and the world turned upside down. But Eric’s death was different. It showed my father’s power and the depth of the darkness of his heart. My father ordered Eric’s death for loving me.
Nothing can quite describe how it feels to watch someone die, knowing there’s nothing you can do to help them. My father himself held me back with his men to prevent me from doing anything, only releasing me once it was over.
Death is the end.
So… I guess my handsome, Italian stranger was right. What’s going on with me can’t be that bad.
I was crying because Dmitri not only decided he’d take Sacha’s place today and watch me at work, but he also alluded to me quitting my job at the clinic when we got married.
He wants to take away the one thing I’d managed to secure for myself, my career. If that gets stripped away from me there will be nothing left.
I got home about an hour ago and went up to my room to have some privacy.
Dmitri stayed downstairs taking calls while he waited for Sacha to relieve him for the night shift.
Sacha isn’t here yet and I’m a nervous wreck in my own home with this creep who will be my husband in the next few months. I can barely believe it. I can’t even believe I’m thinking those words.
I’ve been updating my work plan to distract myself, hoping Sacha will come soon.
Setting my pen down on the desk, I move over to my bed to rest for a while. I didn’t sleep much last night. With the damn bomb Dad dropped on me I couldn’t. The ghosts from the past haunt me when I sleep.
I used to have reoccurring nightmares every night. Then they became manageable. Last night was the first in a long time I had the nightmare. Last night was about Eric. I saw his death play out like it was happening all over again.
No one knew we were seeing each other, then someone found out. Until this day I don’t know how. Not even Sacha knew, but I always believed he suspected it. Eric was new and not much older than me. This year is four years since it happened. I was eighteen and he was twenty-five.
I’ll never know, but I think it was Dmitri who found out and told my father. He had so much fun beating Eric to death I’m sure it was him.
The man in the park today had a compassionate presence about him that stayed with me. I’ll probably never see him again, but he’s not the kind of man a girl would easily forget.
With those piercing, bright blue eyes, and that longish hair, slightly tussled in the wind. Beautiful, but strong. That’s how I would describe him.Content from NôvelDr(a)ma.Org.
I reach into my bag by my bedside and pull out the origami flower. It was nice of him to give this to me. A nice thing to do for a stranger. Maybe I’m naive. I don’t really get to talk to many men.
Whatever his motive, it was nice.
When he looked at Dmitri standing at the door, he seemed like the kind of man who wouldn’t care who he was. He’d still be able to defy him in a heartbeat.
I wonder if he would still think my situation wasn’t that bad if he’d heard what Dmitri said to me when I walked up to him. He threatened to tear the skin off me if he had to punish me.
The door opens and damn it to hell, he comes in. Think of the devil and he appears. Dmitri walks in and I get off the bed. I don’t want to give him any ideas.
The asshole smiles at me and scans the bed. That desire that disgusts me comes into his eyes and all I want to do is run away. Run far away and never come back. Never look back.
“You didn’t have to get up,” he says coming closer.
“Do you want something?”
“Yes.”
“What? What do you want?”
“Many things my sweet Isabella. I’ve been thinking a lot about that mouth of yours on my cock.”
He laughs and I pray he doesn’t mean to start his violation of me tonight.
I would hate if he made me do something like that. And what could I do about it? Not a damn thing.
“Where is Sacha?” I ask trying to evade the vile direction this conversation just took.
“Nearly here. You know when I’m in charge he’s the first thing I’ll change. No more Sacha to protect the poor princess. You’ll have to do everything I say.”
“Good for you. You’ll have all the power.”
“That mouth of yours. I fucking love it. I’m glad you know your place.”
“Did you mean what you said about my work at the clinic?” Once again, I’m pushing on dangerous paths. But I want to hear it. I want to be clear about what’s happening next. Was he serious or was he just being a prick?
“I think you know by now that I never, ever say anything I don’t mean. You’ll do away with all that shit when we get married.”
What an asshole.
“Why? My father didn’t have a problem with it. Why should you?” I’m close to tears again.
“Isabella, your father is your father. You are for fucking and will serve your purpose in my bed and in my home.”
“How can you talk to me like that?”
“My dear girl you haven’t seen anything yet. The minute we say I do we’ll be on the next plane to Russia.”
“Russia?” My mouth falls open. “We’re going to Russia?” I have no desire to live there ever again. I have too many memories of my mother there that end with her death.
“We are.”
“You asshole,” I rasp. God, I must have some death wish.
He does exactly what I expect him to and reaches for me.
He shoves me hard against the wall and clutches his thick fingers around my throat.
I scream and God must hear me because the door flies open, and Sacha bounds through it.
“What the hell’s going on in here?” Sacha demands.
Dmitri releases me and growls. “You fucking dog, knock next time. Do not barge in when you obviously know I’m in here.”
“Dmitri, you aren’t in charge of me yet and she doesn’t belong to you, yet.” Sacha points out. It’s the first time that he’s taken such a stand.
It’s surprises me.
Dmitri looks him over and gives him a crude smile. “I’d be careful if I were you Sacha. Don’t want to piss me off and screw yourself over. I’m not a man to fuck with.”
“Nor I. You know we aren’t supposed to issue any punishment unless Mortimer sanctions it, but I just walked in and saw you with your hands around her throat. I wonder what the boss would say if he knew that.” He raises his brows.
Dmitri backs down at the threat, but still maintains that air of arrogance.
“Nicely played. Go on, do your work. Watch and be merry. I’ll be very happy to deal with you when the time comes.” Dmitri walks out, knocking his shoulder against Sacha’s as he passes.
I’m breathing so hard I can barely focus. I’m shaking again and I’m a mess inside and out.
I feel like Dmitri’s hand is still clutching at my throat. It feels like he’s squeezing my hopes and dreams from me. Bleeding my mind of the last shred of what makes me, me.
Sacha comes up to me when we hear the front door close and tears stream down my cheeks for the umpteenth time today.
He takes hold of my shoulders with that fatherly warmth and just holds me.