59
Nicholas
A FTER SELINA HAD vanished without a trace, I grew cold and distant with everyone around me. Her disappearance changed me, molded me into the man I am today. The more time that passed, the harder my exterior became until I was just a shell of the former smiling, charming boy I once was. Her leaving left a black hole in my chest where my heart once was. I threw myself into work alongside my father, and that is when I learned about how truly cruel the world can be and oftentimes is.
I thought having Selina back would change…everything. I thought we would go back to how we were; that the past decade would somehow just erase itself. But it seems like we’re at some sort of crossroads, and I’m having trouble figuring out which direction I should go to move forward.
I still haven’t told her who I am. A part of me is still holding out hope that she will somehow just know it’s me like I did when I first saw her. Granted, I don’t have a distinguishable feature like she does with her heterochromia. Without her strange eye colors, would I have even known it was Lina in that hallway?
Probably not. We haven’t seen each other since we were teenagers, and a lot has changed since then.
I do need to tell her the truth, though. I just have no idea how she’s going to react to that news. Will she be sad, happy? Or will she be mad at me for not finding her sooner?
I want to tell her that we never stopped looking for her; that there hasn’t been a single day where she hasn’t crossed my mind. She has no idea of the lengths I have gone to to try and locate her. I’ve literally put my life on the line more times than I can fucking count, infiltrating numerous human trafficking rings to try to get some information on anything that would lead me to her whereabouts. And coming up empty so many damn times nearly broke me.
I guess the unknown is what’s truly preventing me from confessing everything to her. That coupled with the fact that she keeps asking about Constantine, which makes me think he had her under his control for a large part of her life, maybe even the whole time that she was missing. I desperately want to know the answers, but I know I have to be patient when it comes to Selina. She’s strong, but she’s in a delicate state right now. I’m sure she’s been through hell more times than anyone ever should, and I don’t want to push her too hard, too fast, especially if she’s not ready. I know the information I seek will come out eventually. And I can be a very patient man when I want to be.
Making my way into the large dining room on the other side of the compound, I find my parents, my sister and Benito already digging into a delicious-looking dinner. It’s my father’s favorite – spaghetti with homemade bread and salad.
“You’re late,” Aria chides me with a grin.
“I was busy,” I mutter before taking a seat.
My mother smiles at me before passing me a large bowl. “How is Selina?”
“Better,” I admit while scooping some of the salad onto my plate. I’m glad I can finally say that and not be totally lying. Seeing her sober and not under the influence of any kind of substance is refreshing, to say the least.
“Does she know who you are yet?” Aria chimes in.
“Not yet. But I’ll tell her,” I say with a frown.NôvelDrama.Org content rights.
“When?” Aria asks.
I roll my eyes at her. Aria has always been one to meddle in my affairs. She’s the nosy, little, bratty sister I never wanted, but I honestly can’t imagine life without her even though she’s a pain in my ass most days. “Soon,” I say vaguely.
She hums in disapproval and then turns her attention back to her meal.
I’m about to put the first bite of food in my mouth when my father tells me, “Constantine is in town. The funeral for his son is tomorrow.” I open my mouth to speak, but he holds up a hand, stopping me. “Just so we’re clear, Nico, we’re not going anywhere near the funeral or the cemetery. Constantine will have eyes and ears everywhere, and we can’t afford to draw any more unwanted attention to our family. I will not have anyone put in that vulnerable position and risk capture…or worse.”
Even though we’re missing out on an opportunity to track Constantine and gather intel, maybe even enough information to bring him and his empire down once and for all, I agree with my father. I already fucked things up for everyone, and now we all have to be on our toes if…no, when Constantine figures out it was me who killed his son.
“Selina was with Constantine for a period of time,” I announce to the table. I hear Benito curse under his breath, but I continue. “He hurt her. I feel it in my gut. I don’t know how long she was with him, but I know the bastard scared her to the point where she’s afraid he’s coming for her even now.”
“It could explain why we never found her,” my father suggests. “We have barely been able to track Constantine over the years since he was released from jail.”
I nod in agreement. If Selina was with him all this time, all the previous missing pieces of the puzzle would slowly fit together, creating a crystal-clear image. Constantine somehow got his hands on Selina and was keeping her on his yacht out in the middle of the ocean where the rules don’t apply to people like him. He kept his distance from New York City and kept a low profile, still defiling women and probably Selina along the way without any consequences for his fucked-up actions.
The thing I can’t figure out is how Selina got mixed up with the likes of him. How did their paths cross? I hope to fuck it wasn’t because of our connection with her, but I don’t feel like that’s it. There’s something else. A big part to this story is missing.
I push the salad around on my plate as I sit and stew in my thoughts. I thought bringing Selina back home would make everything better, but I know there’s a long road ahead of us. She’s slowly recovering, so all I can do is give her time at this point.
If she was with Constantine, I can only imagine the horrors she lived through and witnessed over the past decade. I shudder at the thought of them and her going through that living, breathing nightmare. The only solace I can muster is the fact that she’s here with me now. She’s finally home. It won’t be an easy road ahead of us, but I’m going to be there with her every single step of the way. I’ll never give up on Selina, because I know she would have done the same exact thing for me had the roles been reversed.
I’ve been a closed off, moody son-of-a-bitch since she disappeared, but I’ll try to be a better person. For her. Only for her.
My humanity shut off a long time ago. When she left, my heart ceased beating, leaving a dark, empty hole in my chest. My entire world came to a halt. And now that she’s back, I can feel that dark muscle beginning to beat again. She’s slowly bringing me back to life, and she doesn’t even realize it.
The only thing that will bring me more peace would be the feel of Constantine’s neck in my hands as I squeeze the very life from him and watch the light in his eyes slowly fade away.
He hurt my girl. I can feel it deep in my soul. And his blood on my hands would make me rest a little easier. I’m sure it would help Selina immensely as well. Having her real-life boogeyman dead and unable to ever hurt her again would be a great gift to her; one I plan on giving.
“Everything all right, Nico?” my mother asks, bringing me out of my dark thoughts.
I look up at her and force a smile. “Not yet. But it will be,” I assure her.