Always Been You

~Lola’s POV~Nôvel(D)rama.Org's content.

This is the biggest mistake I’ve ever made in my life. One of them, at least. It’s been four years and eight months since I left home. I’ve completely forgotten what it’s like. But here I am, in the center of Ozark Regional Airport, awaiting my flight back to New York. I’m surrounded by individuals who are excited about a voyage to who knows where, but all I see is dread. I neglected my children and went on that hike with Mason and June. That could have been planned for all I know. June did a wonderful job of sending those pictures to my husband, Dante. I had a moment with Mason. I don’t regret it, but at the same time, I can’t jump into a relationship with him while I still have unresolved issues with Dante. Dante wasn’t meant to find out about Mason and me in this way. Not that I’m dating him or anything, but I am still Dante’s wife, and now I have given him yet another reason to take my children away. I am not sure if I like Mason, but I sure did enjoy the kiss. Will Dante chase me out of the house because of what happened with Mason? Am I even ready to face Dante? But then again, I can’t live without my children, so I have to face the devil himself. After all this time, I’m not even sure if the pain is worth it.

I shouldn’t feel awful about kissing Mason, but I can’t shake the feeling that I’ve been duped. And, like an idiot, I went along with it. Was Mason involved in that ridiculous game as well? June gambled with my children, not realizing that her actions would cost me far more than she could have imagined. How can a woman pretend for that long? It’s been a long time. I guess she’s a pro. However, why did she do it? To get Dante out of the way so that I can be with her brother? Or to get rid of me so she can be Mrs. Monroe? Or was it just for fun? Does it even matter now? But then Dante saw those pictures, and he didn’t call me. Am I safe at all?

As the plane pitched in the sky, I was busy preparing a speech about how I was going to tell him how he wasted my time all those years, how he made me think we were on the same page, and also how it felt hearing Candice moan his name while I was carrying his children. I will face him and take my children to Ozark or anywhere else on the globe. Ozark, everything I thought I knew about that small town, was a lie. I lived a lie for almost 5 years. I have nothing that matters there. Or Mason. Is it fair to give him the benefit of the doubt? What if he knew about all this? Nothing is worth it anymore in that town. But maybe, just maybe, if Mason didn’t know of his sister’s schemes, I would have something to get back to. But, on the other hand, do I really like Mason that much? When someone shouted that we were landing, I snapped out of my trance.

The airport was crowded. I dragged my luggage and headed outside. The cool, warm breeze stroked over my skin, and all I could think of was smelling the ambiance of the place I once called home. Come to think of it, I really have no home. I tried to make New York City my home, but I was betrayed. I, too, attempted to make Ozark my home, but I was betrayed once more. Wow, I face betrayal everywhere I go. Now it will look like I ran away from Ozark because of what June did to me, or did I?

When my cab driver arrived, I gave him my address. The car came to a halt in front of Dante’s mansion. I peered at the massive gate as one of the guards approached the car, looking fatigued. I pulled down the window.

“Oh my God, Mrs. Monroe, come on in.”

“What happened to you?” I asked.

“It’s a long story.” He suddenly came to a halt and glanced at me. “Actually, Mrs. Monroe, Mr. Monroe, gave orders to Ms. Candice not to set foot in this house. But that woman kept pressing, so today she drugged us and went inside the house. Mrs. Monroe, I’m so delighted you’re back. At least after all these years, Ms. Candice will finally know that Mr. Monroe meant it when he got rid of her.” I was taken aback. Why wasn’t Dante with Candice? I assumed they were in love. This is fascinating. He told me I was a mistake and yet he couldn’t be with her. I turned to face the guard.

“How long ago?”

“Since you…” He came to a halt and stared at me again. “Run away.” This does not make sense. I rolled down my window further as the car drove inside. I got out of the car, and the driver assisted me with my luggage. I paid him and left him a generous tip. I hauled my luggage in and went in. Before I could call out for my children, I heard a certain familiar voice trying to lay claim to my children.

“Dante, please. Lola is not here. The children need a mother.” I was enraged. I wished I could choke her to death. How could she? Is she aware of everything I went through to bring those children into the world?

“And what gives you the impression that you can mother my children?” I noticed her surprised expression as she turned. She wants Dante back and wants to use my children. She was my friend, but I’m done playing friend to people who will and have never considered me one. I was merely a pawn in her games.

“You bitch, you stole Dante from me.” I looked around to see where my children were. I mean, I’m being called a bitch and my children could hear that. And I didn’t want them to witness this side of me. I’m done being an altruist. I am not a pushover anymore. If not anything, she knew everything about me and Dante. She knew there was more to our friendship. She once told me he called her by my name when he was banging her. When I saw that the coast was clear, I walked up to her.

Slap!

I looked at her, daring her to call me a bitch again. She, however, did not. She was surprised, and I took the opportunity to tell her how pathetic she was. Not that I was any better. No, I wasn’t. I took my time and saw Catalina standing right there, staring at me. A woman who has never been a mother to me. Then I looked at Martha. I almost dashed over to hug her and cry my heart out. But then, if I have to win this, I will have to use the wife title. Anything for my children.